Are Land Sharks the End?

[stevetheintern]

While reading the "Bear vs." topic earlier, I remembered a conversation that I overheard this weekend:

A: I don't know, I'd say that if sharks could walk on land we'd all be in some deep trouble.

B: It's sad, now that I go to Nature College (Steven's Point), I feel that I have to disagree. Isn't that sad?

A: Sure...What do you mean you disagree?!? If there were sharks on land, we'd all be screwed.

B: I don't think so...sharks tend to eat only small animals and rarely attack for pleasure.

A: But these are land sharks! And besides, I think that once the sharks realize that humans are just as defenseless as most small animals, that'd be it.

What do you think?

Some things to consider (that I also overheard):

Sharks may or may not be able to come to such a realization.
Sharks are very protective of their area.
These are big, mean ass land sharks (as opposed to like a nerf shark).
Once a shark is out of water, it may think differently.

I apologize if I've wasted your time.

[Mayfair]

I think speed would have to come into play here. Sure, the shark may be on land but does he have to wiggle around or does he walk and if he does walk, can he run. A dangerous animal is only dangerous if he CATCHES YOU. Yes, yes, sharp teeth...yes, blood thirst, but can I out run it?

More to ponder...

[bomberz1qr20]

I've never actually seen a landshark in action, aside from ols SNL.

One thing for sure, don't answer the door if there are landsharks in the area.

[oddy]

landsharks??

Do u mean lawyers?

[yawn]

I went to zoo camp when I was eight and they told us an alligator could outrun a horse in a fifty yard dash, I guess the serpentine question would come into play.

[Maurice]

On last summer's tour, one bit of tour humor (developed while we were sitting in traffic trying to get to Chicago, in fact) came out of the debate as to whether a shark with a tattoo would be more bad-ass than a regular old shark. We thought so, and that the tattoo should be a skull with crossed machine guns beneath it.

We also liked the idea of saying to the tattoo artist, "No, no. Not a tattoo of a shark; we want you to tattoo the shark."

Anyway, a shark with a gun would be even more bad-ass than a shark with a tattoo of a gun.

[Carry Me Away]

Yes, land sharks would be fierce. Insanely fierce, and I wouldn't want to ever have to confront such a beast.

But heres the thing...

Would they be any more fierce or potentially hazardous to our health than any other various ferocious beast that could easily shred a human in hand to hand or hand to fin combat?

It's our capacity for intelligence and intelligent design that sets us apart from these beasts.

Would we be out numbered by these land sharks? Would these sharks also be beyond Deep Blue (Cuba Gooding Jr, Samuel L. Jackson..etc movie) smart?

See heres my two cents. I think we at this stage in our advancement would handle the situation with efficiency and the threat of land sharks would be contained, but back in the stone age day before the advent of our modern arms it would be a whole 'nother story.

I mean land sharks are killers. But when a shotgun enters the equation are the odds shifted?

Wow.